It might just be that heaven doesn’t exist,
If our love doesn’t persist.
It might just be that our joy is paired equally with suffering shared.


The raven takes its place on my branches,
it’s keen sight
watching the going ons
below, above, and within.
I can hear its voice call
I can see the world spin.
More death, more life.
More still evidence of Yah
of God.
Oh my Lord, my God!
Where has your spirit flown?
Have you left me alone?
Return to my branches
bring your community.
If you must set me aflame,
I’ll try not to complain,
But it burns and burns and burns.
My eyes cry, cry, cry.
Love the fire,
Love the fire,
Love the all consuming fire.

I fell under the juniper tree,
where one can still see the stars
and still smell the desert.
A tree not so tall,
as to be arrogant.
Under the juniper tree I found my lot,
to love, love and grow old.
To die and birth again,
to withstand drought.
To carry ones death on
though it weighs down so.

I stood next to a juniper.
It had all but died,
she had one vein of life
making it’s way up her side.
Huge dead branches clung to the wide girth.
A roost of ravens
got comfortable
and spent the night.
But this tree has all but died,
it takes a keen eye
to find its source of life.
The ravens preach their calls
almost past dark
to catch any others wandering
lost in flight.
They’ve all gathered
and tomorrow they’ll feast,
but for now they’ll sleep in a
big dead tree.

I have not yet learned

How to be

A tree

Planted by still waters.

“Avalanche” is my favorite album by Sufjan Stevens. Last year while trekking in the Himalayas I was able to see my first avalanche, though I heard it first. It was great, as I was safe. Now in Colorado exploring the back country with my snowboard a little (very little) I’m learning more about the conditions that could cause an avalanche. While hiking in it’s common to dig a “snowpit” this allows you to see the conditions of the snow, primarily the way the snow has layered. Through out the season layers build and though the top layers may be bonded well the early layers often bond poorly due to inconsistent temperatures during the beginning of winter. Now usually if you’re staying below tree level these conditions have a nominal effect. The trees help to keep the snow from cracking and sliding much in the same way they keep mudslides from occurring. But If you’re going high or going steep your observation skills better be savvy.

An avalanche of faith: The first layer of any pursuit of faith, when the first snows of Gods grace began to fall, was quite warm. The fires of hell surrounded me, they were threatening my eternal soul and were consuming every friend I made in high school. How I would weep for their souls (and gloat a little for my own). The message of Gods love began to deepen in my life, all along however was the heat of hell flame crystallizing and confusing my foundations.

Now later in the season as people have trodden over and through this grace my faith has cracked and slid. All that remains is below.

And He said to him, ” ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 22:37-40 NASB)

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. (John 13:34 NASB)

If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. ……”This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you. (John 15:10, 12-14 NASB)

Beloved (please be loved!) let us love one another, for love comes from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. 1 John 4:7

And that’s how the cookie crumbles.